{"id":115071,"date":"2019-10-01T11:00:02","date_gmt":"2019-10-01T10:00:02","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/?p=115071"},"modified":"2023-03-07T19:14:42","modified_gmt":"2023-03-07T19:14:42","slug":"my-job-is-killing-me-losing-the-will-to-live","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/my-job-is-killing-me-losing-the-will-to-live.htm","title":{"rendered":"Help, My Job is Killing Me! Work and Losing the Will to Live"},"content":{"rendered":"<div id=\"attachment_115074\" style=\"width: 410px\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/41863154020_92e15db283.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-115074\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-115074\" src=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/41863154020_92e15db283-400x267.jpg\" alt=\"losing will to live\" width=\"400\" height=\"267\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/41863154020_92e15db283-400x267.jpg 400w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/41863154020_92e15db283-180x120.jpg 180w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/41863154020_92e15db283.jpg 499w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 400px) 100vw, 400px\" \/><\/a><p id=\"caption-attachment-115074\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">By: <a href=\"https:\/\/www.flickr.com\/photos\/159770474@N08\/41863154020\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noreferrer\" \">1Day Review<\/a><\/p><\/div>\n<p><span style=\"color: #333399;\">by Andrea\u00a0 M. Darcy<\/span><\/p>\n<p>Really<a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/being-happy-why-is-it-so-hard.htm\"> unhappy<\/a> at work and feel like<a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/should-i-quit-my-job.htm\"> your job is slowing killing you<\/a>? If you are losing the will to live, it\u2019s a serious issue. Editor and lead writer <span style=\"color: #333399;\">Andrea M Darcy<\/span> explores.<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #800080;\"><em>*if you are feeling like you might really hurt yourself or others, please call emergency services or go to the nearest A&amp;E. If you desperately need someone to talk to, don&#8217;t hesitate to call the Good Samaritans on 116 123<\/em>.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<h3>Work Suicide is Serious<\/h3>\n<p>The Office of National Statistics\u2019 most recent survey &#8216;<a href=\"https:\/\/www.ons.gov.uk\/peoplepopulationandcommunity\/birthsdeathsandmarriages\/deaths\/articles\/suicidebyoccupation\/england2011to2015\">Suicide by Occupation&#8217;<\/a> found that:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>men in low skill occupations had a 44%\u00a0 higher risk of committing suicide than average<\/li>\n<li>women working in culture, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/mental-health-in-the-media-why-we-should-all-be-concerned.htm\">media<\/a>, and sport occupations had a 69% higher risk of suicide than the national average<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/caregiver-mental-health-taking-care-of-you-when-taking-care-of-others.htm\">carers, a group now being targeted for mental health awareness<\/a> due to the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/mental-health-in-the-workplace.htm\">stress of the job<\/a>, had a 50% greater risk.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h3>Is it just the job that sees you losing the will to live?<\/h3>\n<blockquote><p><span style=\"color: #333399;\">Feel your job is a dead end, and you have <span style=\"color: #800080;\"><a style=\"color: #800080;\" href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/why-do-i-feel-hopeless.htm\">lost hope<\/a> <\/span>you can find anything else? Or working so hard you are <span style=\"color: #800080;\"><a style=\"color: #800080;\" href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/causes-of-exhaustion.htm\">always exhausted<\/a><\/span>, but still are <span style=\"color: #800080;\"><a style=\"color: #800080;\" href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/10-ways-help-debt-problems.htm\">always in debt<\/a><\/span>? Do you feel that your job is part of a<span style=\"color: #800080;\"> <a style=\"color: #800080;\" href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/what-are-adverse-childhood-experiences-aces.htm\">struggle you\u2019ve felt trapped in since childhood<\/a><\/span>? These can all put you at a higher risk of being suicidal.<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>The same survey mentioned above felt that, \u201cit may not be the actual occupation that puts individuals at risk, but features of the job such as low pay, job security and the wider socio-economic characteristics of individuals employed in a particular sector.\u201d<\/p>\n<p><strong>Other factors can include:<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/bullying-in-the-workplace-case-study.htm\">workplace bullying<\/a> and harassment<\/li>\n<li>feeling underestimated and overlooked<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/setting-expectations.htm\">unrealistic expectations<\/a> on employees like long hours<\/li>\n<li>being forced to do things you don\u2019t agree with.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h3>It\u2019s not just the job<\/h3>\n<div id=\"attachment_115082\" style=\"width: 410px\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/2251351923_13dc66109c.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-115082\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-115082\" src=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/2251351923_13dc66109c-400x266.jpg\" alt=\"losing will to live\" width=\"400\" height=\"266\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/2251351923_13dc66109c-400x266.jpg 400w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/2251351923_13dc66109c.jpg 500w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/2251351923_13dc66109c-180x120.jpg 180w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 400px) 100vw, 400px\" \/><\/a><p id=\"caption-attachment-115082\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">By: <a href=\"https:\/\/www.flickr.com\/photos\/bpende\/2251351923\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noreferrer\" \">Brad P.<\/a><\/p><\/div>\n<p><strong>When we are <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/what-to-do-if-you-feel-depressed.htm\">very depressed<\/a> and losing the will to live we tend to pick a \u2018scape goat\u2019. Our job is a great candidate because<\/strong> it\u2019s socially acceptable to complain about it.<\/p>\n<p><strong>But research shows that there are usually other factors at play, such as<\/strong> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/life-changing-events.htm\">many stressful life events happening at once<\/a>. This could be a <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/getting-over-a-breakup.htm\">breakup<\/a>, a <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/truth-about-grief-and-bereavement.htm\">bereavement<\/a>, health issues, or <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/anxiety-vs-depression.htm\">depression and anxiety <\/a>from unresolved <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/how-can-i-remember-childhood-trauma-abuse.htm\">childhood trauma<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>For example, <a href=\"https:\/\/pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/17178646\/\">a study of suicide amongst Australian construction workers<\/a> found that, \u201cyoung employees were at excessive risk with separation\/divorce, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/common-issues-in-couples-therapy.htm\">relationship problems<\/a>, and untreated psychiatric conditions the major contributors.\u201d<\/p>\n<p><strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/drinking-too-much-alcohol.htm\">High levels of alcohol consumption<\/a> or <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/club-drugs-and-therapy.htm\">recreational drug use<\/a> can also make us more vulnerable to harming ourselves.<\/strong> Another study on the construction industry found that nearly two-two-thirds of sucides had involved prior alcohol consumption.<\/p>\n<h3>What do I do if I am losing the will to live because of work?<\/h3>\n<p>If you feel your job is killing you, it\u2019s time to take action, even if it is uncomfortable.<\/p>\n<h4><span style=\"color: #993366;\">1. Shine a light on it.<\/span><\/h4>\n<p>Call them vampires if it helps &#8212; suicidal thoughts prosper in secrecy and the hidden darkness of our minds. So exposing them to the light of day is the first and best step.<\/p>\n<p>Yes, as in tell someone. Make it someone you can trust. If you are scared of what people will think, and don\u2019t have a friend or family member you can trust, then call a free hotline. Listeners want to hear from you, they spend hours training to do so. It\u2019s just about getting the words out of your head. When we speak them, you can start deal with them.<\/p>\n<div id=\"attachment_115083\" style=\"width: 277px\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/41221455401_cb8c5f10e2.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-115083\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-115083\" src=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/41221455401_cb8c5f10e2-267x400.jpg\" alt=\"losing will to live\" width=\"267\" height=\"400\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/41221455401_cb8c5f10e2-267x400.jpg 267w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/41221455401_cb8c5f10e2.jpg 334w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 267px) 100vw, 267px\" \/><\/a><p id=\"caption-attachment-115083\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">By: <a href=\"https:\/\/www.flickr.com\/photos\/oistedu\/41221455401\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noreferrer\" \">OIST<\/a><\/p><\/div>\n<h4><span style=\"color: #993366;\">2. Take advantage of resources.<\/span><\/h4>\n<p><strong>Most workplaces in the UK now have mental health support for employees, whether that is several<\/strong> counselling services covered by insurance or free online courses you can take. It is there to be used. If you don\u2019t want to explain in detail, just say you are struggling with your moods and be firm that you prefer to discuss in greater detail with your counsellor, not HR.<\/p>\n<p><strong>If you are being bullied or harassed or if the law is otherwise being broken in your workplace<\/strong> &#8212; unpaid hours, unethical requests &#8212; then sometimes what is needed to give hope is proper legal advice.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Sometimes we feel<\/strong> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/why-do-i-feel-hopeless.htm\">utterly hopeless<\/a> as we are making huge <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/making-assumptions.htm\">assumptions<\/a>. Perhaps we have never met anyone who did what we want to do, so assume it\u2019s impossible. We assume we could never find another job, retrain, or are too old for a job change.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Other times we simply need more information to see a light at the end of the tunnel. This could be a<\/strong> spot of careers counselling, or <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/coaching-and-counselling.htm\">working with a coach<\/a> to help you realise your other talents you can\u2019t see. Or it could be looking up mentor programs, or going to a local college to enquire about what it takes to sign up for other training. You might even want to talk to your local council who might offer programs to help you if you want to launch your own business or retrain.<\/p>\n<h4><span style=\"color: #993366;\">3. Learn how to face and overcome suicidal thinking.<\/span><\/h4>\n<p><strong>Suicidal thinking, and all the negative self talk it brings? It\u2019s not who you are.<\/strong> It\u2019s what it sounds like &#8212; just thoughts. And no matter how \u2018true\u2019 these thoughts sound? They aren\u2019t. They are what is known as <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/cognitive-distortions.htm\">cognitive distortions<\/a> &#8212; deviations from the truth that trick us.<\/p>\n<p><strong>You can actually learn to handle and navigate suicidal thinking so that it has less and less power over you. <\/strong>Learn how in\u00a0our articles on <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/managing-suicidal-thoughts.htm\">handling suicidal thinking<\/a> and <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/balanced-thinking-benefits.htm\">balanced thinking<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #ff0000;\">Again, if you are feeling very suicidal, like you might hurt yourself or others, it\u2019s important you get help. Call emergency services, or go to the nearest A&amp;E.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><strong>If you are having suicidal thoughts but don\u2019t think you\u2019ll hurt yourself then good advice is:<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>get to a safe space<\/li>\n<li>talk to someone you trust<\/li>\n<li>distract yourself<\/li>\n<li>focus on the present (today is not the day to worry about future)<\/li>\n<li>dodge your triggers (alcohol, drugs, sad music, toxic friends)<\/li>\n<li>do things that make you feel good (exercise, cooking, being in nature)<\/li>\n<li>connect (with friends, animals, nature, your version of God)<\/li>\n<li>seek proper support (GP, or emergency services if you are going to really hurt yourself).<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong><span style=\"color: #800080;\">Time to talk to someone who gets it about your suicidal thought and career frustrations? We connect you with top London counsellors. Or find <span style=\"color: #333399;\"><a style=\"color: #333399;\" href=\"https:\/\/harleytherapy.com\/?utm_source=Harley%20Therapy%20Blog&amp;utm_content=Post%20End\">UK-wide registered therapists<\/a><\/span> and <a href=\"https:\/\/harleytherapy.com\/therapists?location_type=skype&amp;utm_source=Harley%20Therapy%20Blog&amp;utm_content=Post%20End\"><span style=\"color: #333399;\">online counsellors<\/span><\/a> on our <a href=\"https:\/\/harleytherapy.com\/?utm_source=Harley%20Therapy%20Blog&amp;utm_content=Post%20End\"><span style=\"color: #333399;\">booking platform<\/span><\/a>.\u00a0<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p><em><strong>Still have a question about losing the will\u00a0 to live over work? Post below.\u00a0<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n<p class=\"p1\"><span style=\"color: #333399;\"><b><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\" wp-image-114425 alignleft\" src=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/Screenshot-2019-02-23-at-18.17.37-150x150.png\" alt=\"Andrea M. Darcy therapy coach\" width=\"134\" height=\"134\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/Screenshot-2019-02-23-at-18.17.37-150x150.png 150w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/Screenshot-2019-02-23-at-18.17.37-200x200.png 200w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/Screenshot-2019-02-23-at-18.17.37-50x50.png 50w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 134px) 100vw, 134px\" \/>Andrea M. Darcy<\/b> is a health and wellbeing writer as well as mentor, trained in person-centred counselling and coaching. Find her on Instagram @am_darcy<\/span><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>by Andrea\u00a0 M. Darcy Really unhappy at work and feel like your job is slowing killing you? If you are losing the will to live, it\u2019s a serious issue. Editor and lead writer Andrea M Darcy explores. *if you are feeling like you might really hurt yourself or others, please call emergency services or go [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":8,"featured_media":115083,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","_lmt_disableupdate":"yes","_lmt_disable":"no","footnotes":""},"categories":[298],"tags":[144,172],"class_list":["post-115071","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-work-life","tag-work-stress","tag-workplace-stress","has_thumb"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v27.0 (Yoast SEO v27.0) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Help, My Job is Killing Me! Work and Losing the Will to Live - Harley Therapy\u2122 Blog<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Is your job going badly, and you worry you are losing the will to live? You are not alone and its time to talk. Work suicide is a real issue with solutions\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/my-job-is-killing-me-losing-the-will-to-live.htm\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_GB\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Help, My Job is Killing Me! Work and Losing the Will to Live\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Is your job going badly, and you worry you are losing the will to live? You are not alone and its time to talk. Work suicide is a real issue with solutions\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/my-job-is-killing-me-losing-the-will-to-live.htm\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Harley Therapy\u2122 Blog\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/harleytherapy\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2019-10-01T10:00:02+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2023-03-07T19:14:42+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/41221455401_cb8c5f10e2.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"334\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"500\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Andrea M. 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