{"id":17639,"date":"2017-05-16T11:00:29","date_gmt":"2017-05-16T10:00:29","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/?p=17639"},"modified":"2023-03-11T12:00:49","modified_gmt":"2023-03-11T12:00:49","slug":"daily-distractions-be-concerned","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/daily-distractions-be-concerned.htm","title":{"rendered":"Daily Distractions And What They Hide &#8211; Should You Be Concerned?"},"content":{"rendered":"<div id=\"attachment_17648\" style=\"width: 410px\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/4591916252_e77bc1f44d.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-17648\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-17648\" src=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/4591916252_e77bc1f44d-400x322.jpg\" alt=\"habits \" width=\"400\" height=\"322\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/4591916252_e77bc1f44d-400x322.jpg 400w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/4591916252_e77bc1f44d.jpg 500w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 400px) 100vw, 400px\" \/><\/a><p id=\"caption-attachment-17648\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">By: <a href=\"https:\/\/www.flickr.com\/photos\/artbystevejohnson\/4591916252\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noreferrer\" \">Steve Johnson<\/a><\/p><\/div>\n<p>by Andrea M. Darcy<\/p>\n<p>Daily distractions can be a bit of mindless fun.<\/p>\n<p><strong>But they can also be a way to escape ourselves,<\/strong> and the results can be far from positive.<\/p>\n<p><em>Are you hiding behind a habit of distraction? <\/em><\/p>\n<h2>Habits of distraction \u2013 sound familiar?<\/h2>\n<p><strong>The following habits, if overused, can be an unconscious distraction or &#8216;escape&#8217; from uncomfortable emotions and thoughts:<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>TV and film bingeing<\/li>\n<li>cruising the internet<\/li>\n<li>video games<\/li>\n<li>romance novels<\/li>\n<li>gossip mags<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/truth-about-overeating-case-study.htm\">overeating<\/a><\/li>\n<li>masturbation<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/addicted-to-pornography.htm\">watching porn<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/drinking-too-much-alcohol.htm\">drinking<\/a> and <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/club-drugs-and-therapy.htm\">drug use<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/workaholic-symptoms.htm\">workaholism<\/a><\/li>\n<li>being &#8216;busy&#8217; (endless chores, errands, admin)<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/black-and-white-thinking-stop-drama-addict.htm\">drama <\/a>(endless feuds and quarrels)<\/li>\n<li>overtexting.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"color: #800080;\">[<em>Consciously<\/em> choose to do these things instead of getting work done? Then go read our articles on <span style=\"color: #666699;\"><a style=\"color: #666699;\" href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/procrastination-big-deal.htm\">Procrastination<\/a> <\/span>and <span style=\"color: #666699;\"><a style=\"color: #666699;\" href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/managing-adult-adhd.htm\">Adult ADHD<\/a> <\/span>instead.] <\/span><\/p>\n<h2>But what exactly am I trying to escape?<\/h2>\n<p>Constant use of habits that give you a feeling of escape are often helping you avoid one or several of the following:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/repressed-anger.htm\">repressed anger <\/a>or <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/living-with-walking-depression.htm\">sadness<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/repressed-memories-are-they-real.htm\">repressed memories<\/a> and <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/what-are-repressed-emotions.htm\">repressed emotions<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/what-is-childhood-trauma.htm\">traumatic experiences<\/a><\/li>\n<li>feelings of<a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/shame-definition.htm\"> shame<\/a> and <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/why-do-i-feel-guilty-all-the-time.htm\">guilt<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/negative-thoughts.htm\">negative thoughts<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/dealing-with-anxiety.htm\">anxiety<\/a>.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<div id=\"attachment_17658\" style=\"width: 310px\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/2976152466_38039a9043.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-17658\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-17658\" src=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/2976152466_38039a9043-300x400.jpg\" alt=\"daily distractions and what they mean \" width=\"300\" height=\"400\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/2976152466_38039a9043-300x400.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/2976152466_38039a9043.jpg 375w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><\/a><p id=\"caption-attachment-17658\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">By: <a href=\"https:\/\/www.flickr.com\/photos\/mbtrama\/2976152466\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noreferrer\" \">mbtrama<\/a><\/p><\/div>\n<p><strong>Repressed anger or sadness can stem from a<\/strong> childhood where you were taught it&#8217;s &#8216;bad&#8217; to feel and express certain emotions.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Or it could be that you are repressing thoughts and feelings from a<\/strong> recent <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/i-hate-change-management.htm\">life change<\/a>. Did you take a new job, move house, are you in a new relationship? It might be that you are simply not being honest with yourself about the situation.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Often, however, escape behaviours are used to hide from memories and feelings of a distant or even forgotten childhood trauma. <\/strong>This can include <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/abandonment-issues.htm\">abandonment<\/a>, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/symptoms-of-bereavement-how-to-cope.htm\">bereavement<\/a>, and physical or <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/what-is-child-sexual-abuse-why-your-definition-might-need-updating.htm\">sexual abuse<\/a>.<\/p>\n<h2>But surely this habit is normal?! I&#8217;ve done it forever&#8230;<\/h2>\n<p><em>&#8220;But I&#8217;ve done everything on the above list at some point. Surely things like TV watching and texting are normal?&#8221;<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong>Short term use of escape habits is indeed normal.<\/strong> Eating a tub of ice cream every night post breakup to distract yourself from crying is a classic example, as is binge watching TV after a hellish week at work. The difference here is that we are completely conscious of what we are doing. We mentally choose to &#8216;escape&#8217;. We actually are not hiding from what we feel, but taking a break.<\/p>\n<p>But when it comes to long-term reliance on distractions?<\/p>\n<blockquote><p><span style=\"color: #800080;\">It depends on how much you are doing such habits, the ways you indulge, and why. <\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<h2>How to know if your daily distraction habit might hide something<\/h2>\n<p><em><strong>If someone upsets me, or I have a &#8216;bad day&#8217;,<\/strong> do I immediately turn to this activity?<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em><strong>Do I use this activity whenever<\/strong> I &#8216;feel bored&#8217;?<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em><strong>Do I feel comfortably numbed out<\/strong> after I indulge this habit?<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em><strong>Does the rest of the world fade back a little<\/strong>, or even disappear, when I do this activity?<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em><strong>Do I often lose track of time<\/strong> entirely when using this habit?<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em><b>If someone asked me to give this habit up for a week<\/b>, would I feel anxious?<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em><strong>Have I ever found myself halfway through using this habit before realising<\/strong> I was doing so? Or had a feeling of &#8216;coming to&#8217; midway, as if from a trance?<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em><strong>Is this a habit I often turn to when I have to spend time alone<\/strong>? Do I perhaps even prefer doing this thing alone?<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em><strong>Has anyone ever accused me of having a problem<\/strong> with this habit but I&#8217;ve denied it?<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em><strong>Have I been accused of being emotionally repressed<\/strong>, &#8216;shut off&#8217;, &#8216;hard to read&#8217;, or &#8216;cold&#8217;?<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em><strong>Have I ever lied and said I had something important to do so I could<\/strong> go home and indulge my habit? Like saying I had to work then going home and binge watching TV instead of going to a dinner party?<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em><strong>Is my hobby a secret?<\/strong> Do you overeat in secret, have textathons with an ex in secret, spend hours at night cruising the internet in secret, hide your trashy romance novels from your friends?<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong>If you answered yes to several or many of the above, there is a good chance you are using your habit to escape yourself. <\/strong><\/p>\n<h2>The price of avoidance behaviours<\/h2>\n<blockquote>\n<div id=\"attachment_17656\" style=\"width: 410px\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-17656\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-17656\" src=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/2408972296_e5fa437763-400x267.jpg\" alt=\"Daily distractions\" width=\"400\" height=\"267\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/2408972296_e5fa437763-400x267.jpg 400w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/2408972296_e5fa437763.jpg 500w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/2408972296_e5fa437763-180x120.jpg 180w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 400px) 100vw, 400px\" \/><p id=\"caption-attachment-17656\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">By: <a href=\"https:\/\/www.flickr.com\/photos\/shadowsofthesun\/2408972296\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noreferrer\" \">David Brown<\/a><\/p><\/div>\n<p>Using habits to escape uncomfortable thoughts and feelings might have been a very useful<a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/defence-mechanisms.htm\"> coping mechanism <\/a>when you were younger. As a child or adolescent, overeating or playing endless video games might have been the only resort available to things you felt you couldn&#8217;t control. The problem is that spending your entire adult life in distraction mode stops being intelligent or helpful.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><strong>Using habits of distraction can mean the following: <\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>you don&#8217;t<a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/achieving-goals.htm\"> achieve the goals you set<\/a><\/li>\n<li>you <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/how-to-listen-to-yourself.htm\">never know what you really think and feel<\/a><\/li>\n<li>you have<a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/who-am-i-identity-crisis.htm\"> little understanding of who you really are<\/a><\/li>\n<li>you don&#8217;t create a life you&#8217;d be happier in<\/li>\n<li>you often <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/leave-unhappy-relationship.htm\">struggle with relationships <\/a>(avoiding emotions is avoiding yourself, and it&#8217;s hard for someone else to love what they aren&#8217;t allowed to see)<\/li>\n<li>you suffer health issues (obesity, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/addiction-help-guide.htm\">addiction<\/a>, low immune system,<a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/sleep-help-guide.htm\"> sleep disorder<\/a>, poor <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/self-care-a-help-guide.htm\">self-care<\/a>).<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h2>What do I do if I think I have a problem with distraction habits?<\/h2>\n<p>You can start with <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/bibliotherapy-read-yourself-better.htm\">self-help<\/a>. Read up about topics like <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/repressed-anger.htm\">repressed anger<\/a>, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/attachment-theory-bowlby.htm\">attachment theory,<\/a> and <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/what-is-childhood-trauma.htm\">childhood trauma<\/a>. You might also find <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/myths-about-mindfulness.htm\">mindfulness<\/a> hugely helpful when it comes to getting in touch with your long-avoided thoughts and feelings. (Our free, easy to read, and comprehensive <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/mindfulness-help-guide.htm\">Guide to Mindfulness<\/a> is a great place to start).<\/p>\n<p><strong>Ultimately, the help of a professional is advised. Repressed emotions and memories can be overwhelming to navigate alone<\/strong>, and friends and family can be too invested to be the help they mean to be. It can be a huge relief to have the unbiased support a counsellor or psychotherapist provides.<\/p>\n<p><strong><span style=\"color: #808080;\">Harley Therapy puts you in touch with counsellors and psychotherapists who can help you navigate repressed emotions and experiences. Not in the UK? We can also connect you with experienced <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/online-counselling-psychologists.htm#view-therapist\">Online Therapists<\/a> wherever you are. <\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p><em><span style=\"color: #800080;\"><strong>Still have a question about daily distractions and what they can mean? Or want to share an experience with our readers? Post below.<\/strong><\/span><\/em><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #333399;\"><b><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\" wp-image-117271 alignleft\" src=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/headshot-yellow-e1675110089673-150x150.png\" alt=\"Andrea M. Darcy mental health expert\" width=\"129\" height=\"129\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/headshot-yellow-e1675110089673-150x150.png 150w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/headshot-yellow-e1675110089673-200x200.png 200w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/headshot-yellow-e1675110089673-50x50.png 50w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/headshot-yellow-e1675110089673.png 268w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 129px) 100vw, 129px\" \/>Andrea M. Darcy <\/b>is a mental health and wellbeing expert and personal development teacher with training in person-centred counselling and coaching, as well as a popular psychology writer. Follow her on Instagram for useful life tips @am_darcy<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>by Andrea M. Darcy Daily distractions can be a bit of mindless fun. But they can also be a way to escape ourselves, and the results can be far from positive. Are you hiding behind a habit of distraction? Habits of distraction \u2013 sound familiar? The following habits, if overused, can be an unconscious distraction [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":8,"featured_media":17648,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","_lmt_disableupdate":"yes","_lmt_disable":"no","footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-17639","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-depression","has_thumb"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v27.0 (Yoast SEO v27.0) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Daily Distractions And What They Hide - Should You Be Concerned? - Harley Therapy\u2122 Blog<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Daily distractions and what they hide - are you just having a fun moment, or are you stuck in a habit of escaping from yourself? 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Darcy","author_link":"#"},"uagb_comment_info":0,"uagb_excerpt":"by Andrea M. Darcy Daily distractions can be a bit of mindless fun. But they can also be a way to escape ourselves, and the results can be far from positive. Are you hiding behind a habit of distraction? Habits of distraction \u2013 sound familiar? The following habits, if overused, can be an unconscious distraction&hellip;","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17639","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/8"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=17639"}],"version-history":[{"count":26,"href":"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17639\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":137991,"href":"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17639\/revisions\/137991"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/17648"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=17639"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=17639"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=17639"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}