{"id":44152,"date":"2017-11-23T11:00:24","date_gmt":"2017-11-23T11:00:24","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/?p=44152"},"modified":"2023-03-13T12:46:31","modified_gmt":"2023-03-13T12:46:31","slug":"what-is-relational-therapy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/what-is-relational-therapy.htm","title":{"rendered":"What is Relational Therapy and Can It Help You?"},"content":{"rendered":"<div id=\"attachment_44153\" style=\"width: 410px\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/15400144827_caa74762a8.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-44153\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-44153\" src=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/15400144827_caa74762a8-400x300.jpg\" alt=\"what is relational therapy \" width=\"400\" height=\"300\" \/><\/a><p id=\"caption-attachment-44153\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">By: <a href=\"https:\/\/www.flickr.com\/photos\/32742728@N00\/15400144827\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noreferrer\" \">soupstance<\/a><\/p><\/div>\n<p><span style=\"color: #333399;\">by Andrea M. Darcy<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Often find that <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/healthy-relationships-help-guide.htm\">your relationships <\/a>are affecting your mood?<\/li>\n<li>Are you <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/how-does-therapy-help-anxiety.htm\">anxious <\/a>when it comes to social situations like <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/workplace-stress-help-guide.htm\">the workplace<\/a>?<\/li>\n<li>Or do you have <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/fear-of-abandonment.htm\">a tendency to push people away <\/a>even if you want them to like you?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong>Relational therapy might be for you.<\/strong><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"color: #993366;\">What is relational therapy?<\/span><\/h2>\n<p>Arising from the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/psychodynamic-approach.htm\">psychodynamic approach<\/a>, relational therapy believes that <em>to feel good about ourselves and our lives we need to have<a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/healthy-relationships-help-guide.htm\"> good relationships<\/a> with others.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong>If we are depressed or anxious, inevitably it can be traced back to <\/strong>tension\u00a0 or breakdowns in relationships, or an inability to connect.<\/p>\n<p><strong>This might be our relationships with family, colleagues, partners<\/strong>, or all of the above.<\/p>\n<blockquote><p><span style=\"color: #666699;\">Relationship therapy looks at how your background and past experiences are causing you to relate to others in unhelpful ways that leave you unhappy. How can you find freedom from past<a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/quiz-healthy-destructive-relationship\"> destructive relationships<\/a>, and find new ways of interacting with others that make you feel better about yourself and your life?<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><strong><span style=\"color: #333333;\">[Not sure if you are in a destructive relationship? Try our free quiz, &#8220;<a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/healthy-relationships-help-guide.htm\">Are You in a Good Relationship, or Time to Worry?<\/a>&#8220;. ]<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"color: #993366;\">Key concepts of relational therapy<\/span><\/h2>\n<p>Here are some of the concepts that your relational therapist will be working from, and how it can help you.<\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #800080;\">1. Connection matters. <\/span><\/h3>\n<p>Emotional and <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/psychological-health-signs.htm\">psychological wellbeing<\/a> requires that we have balanced, trusting, and <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/healthy-relationships-help-guide.htm\">satisfying relationships<\/a> with others. We need to feel connected.<\/p>\n<p><em>Relational therapy helps you ask, how is it that I relate to others? How do I try to connect, is it working, and if not, why not?\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #800080;\">2. Disconnection leads to mental health issues. <\/span><\/h3>\n<p>If we constantly sabotage connection it results in distress and things like <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/anxiety-vs-depression.htm\">depression, anxiety,<\/a> and disorders.<\/p>\n<p><em>Relational therapy helps you recognise the strategies for disconnection you are unconsciously using around others. How are they constantly leaving you upset and lonely?\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n<div id=\"attachment_44154\" style=\"width: 434px\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-44154\" class=\" wp-image-44154\" src=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/2389404350_e71c63d475-400x263.jpg\" alt=\"what is relational therapy\" width=\"424\" height=\"279\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/2389404350_e71c63d475-400x263.jpg 400w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/2389404350_e71c63d475.jpg 500w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 424px) 100vw, 424px\" \/><p id=\"caption-attachment-44154\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">By: <a href=\"https:\/\/www.flickr.com\/photos\/blackdudemedia\/2389404350\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noreferrer\" \">damon brunson<\/a><\/p><\/div>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #800080;\">3. Authenticity is key. <\/span><\/h3>\n<p>We need to learn how to <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/authentic-relationships.htm\">be ourselves in relationships<\/a> for them to be successful.<\/p>\n<p><i>Who is the real you, and how would your relationships change if you bought that forward?\u00a0<\/i><\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #800080;\">4. The past informs our present.<\/span><\/h3>\n<p>Past relationships determine the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/assumptions-in-relationships.htm\">assumptions <\/a>we make about our present day and future relationships. And what we learned in the past affects the way we act around others in the present.<\/p>\n<p><em>Where did you learn the perspective you see all relationships from? Is it true? How would your relationships be if you stopped making assumptions?\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #800080;\">5. Social and cultural factors affect your ways of being around others. <\/span><\/h3>\n<p>Unlike other forms of therapy, relational therapy puts a focus on how things like culture, race, class and gender are affecting the power dynamics between you and other people.<\/p>\n<p><em>Does you social and cultural background mean you are not giving others a chance? Or are assuming they won&#8217;t give you one? How is this causing you problems and upset?\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #800080;\">6. The relationship that develops between the client and therapist is very important.\u00a0<\/span><\/h3>\n<p>The \u2018<a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/what-is-the-therapeutic-alliance.htm\">therapeutic alliance<\/a>\u2019 you have with your therapist can work as a model for you of how you might heal other relationships in your life, as well as a safe space to try new ways of relating.<\/p>\n<p><em>How can you know when to trust? And what would happen to your relationships if you were are open and relaxed with others as you are beginning to be with your therapist? <\/em><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"color: #993366;\">The benefits of relational therapy<\/span><\/h2>\n<p>Perhaps one of the best ways to understand &#8216;what is relational therapy?&#8217; would be to look at what it aims to deliver to clients.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Benefits can include:\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>more mental and emotional energy<\/li>\n<li>more motivation within relationships and life itself<\/li>\n<li>less power struggles with others<\/li>\n<li>more satisfying relationships<\/li>\n<li>stop pushing people away<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/trusting-others-hard.htm\">develop your ability to trust<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/self-esteem-help-guide.htm\">raised self-esteem<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/how-to-listen-to-yourself.htm\">better self-understanding<\/a>.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h2><span style=\"color: #993366;\">How is relational therapy different than other forms of therapy?<\/span><\/h2>\n<div id=\"attachment_44155\" style=\"width: 410px\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/16815356316_0bc53acd53-1.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-44155\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-44155\" src=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/16815356316_0bc53acd53-1-400x300.jpg\" alt=\"what is relational therapy \" width=\"400\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/16815356316_0bc53acd53-1-400x300.jpg 400w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/16815356316_0bc53acd53-1.jpg 500w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 400px) 100vw, 400px\" \/><\/a><p id=\"caption-attachment-44155\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">By: <a href=\"https:\/\/www.flickr.com\/photos\/eekim\/16815356316\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noreferrer\" \">Eugene Kim<\/a><\/p><\/div>\n<p><strong>Relational therapy is the same as many forms of talk therapy as it\u2019s concerned with<\/strong> how your past experiences are negatively affecting your ways of being in the present, and how you can <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/connecting-with-people.htm\">feel more connected to others<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p><em><strong>But it\u2019s different than some more traditional talk therapies because:<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>it focuses just on the way you relate<\/li>\n<li>it attributes <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/quiz-stressed-or-depressed\">stress, anxiety and depression<\/a> to an inability to connect well with others<\/li>\n<li>it takes into account social and cultural factors<\/li>\n<li>it puts a very strong emphasis on the client-therapist relationship.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h2><span style=\"color: #993366;\">What sorts of issues can relational therapy help with?<\/span><\/h2>\n<p><strong>The following are all issues relational therapy could be helpful for:\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/dealing-with-anxiety.htm\">anxiety<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/what-is-body-dysmorphic-disorder.htm\">body dysmorphia<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/depression-vs-sadness.htm\">depression<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/stress-vs-depression.htm\">stress<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/relationship-problems.htm\">relationship issues<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/7-surprising-reasons-feeling-lonely.htm\">loneliness<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/negative-thoughts.htm\">low self-esteem<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/causes-eating-disorders.htm\">eating disorders<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/anxiety-vs-depression.htm\">social anxiety<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/what-is-trust.htm\">trust issues<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/workplace-stress-myth.htm\">workplace issues<\/a>.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong><span style=\"color: #808080;\">Would you like to try relational therapy? <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.com\/\">Harley Therapy<\/a> now connects you with professional registered therapists across the UK and globally via online therapy.\u00a0<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p class=\"p1\"><span style=\"color: #333399;\"><b><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-thumbnail wp-image-114425 alignleft\" src=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/Screenshot-2019-02-23-at-18.17.37-150x150.png\" alt=\"Andrea M. Darcy health and wellbeing expert writer\" width=\"150\" height=\"150\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/Screenshot-2019-02-23-at-18.17.37-150x150.png 150w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/Screenshot-2019-02-23-at-18.17.37-200x200.png 200w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/Screenshot-2019-02-23-at-18.17.37-50x50.png 50w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 150px) 100vw, 150px\" \/>Andrea M. Darcy<\/b> is a mental health and wellbeing expert, who didmtraining in person-centred counselling and coaching. She often writes about trauma, relationships, and ADHD, and advises people on how to plan their therapy journey. Find her on Instagram @am_darcy<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>by Andrea M. Darcy Often find that your relationships are affecting your mood? Are you anxious when it comes to social situations like the workplace? Or do you have a tendency to push people away even if you want them to like you? Relational therapy might be for you. What is relational therapy? Arising from [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":8,"featured_media":44153,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","_lmt_disableupdate":"yes","_lmt_disable":"no","footnotes":""},"categories":[6,398],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-44152","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-relationships","category-types-of-therapy","has_thumb"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v27.3 (Yoast SEO v27.3) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>What is Relational Therapy and Can It Help You? - Harley Therapy\u2122 Blog<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"What is relational therapy? It&#039;s a great kind of therapy if you find that your relationships negatively affect your mood or you push people away.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/what-is-relational-therapy.htm\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_GB\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"What is Relational Therapy and Can It Help You?\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"What is relational therapy? 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Darcy","author_link":"#"},"uagb_comment_info":0,"uagb_excerpt":"by Andrea M. Darcy Often find that your relationships are affecting your mood? Are you anxious when it comes to social situations like the workplace? Or do you have a tendency to push people away even if you want them to like you? Relational therapy might be for you. What is relational therapy? 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