{"id":5814,"date":"2014-04-03T11:00:12","date_gmt":"2014-04-03T10:00:12","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/?p=5814"},"modified":"2023-03-06T09:58:00","modified_gmt":"2023-03-06T09:58:00","slug":"nobody-understands-me","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/nobody-understands-me.htm","title":{"rendered":"Nobody Understands Me &#8211; Can This Ever Change?"},"content":{"rendered":"<div id=\"attachment_136756\" style=\"width: 277px\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-136756\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-136756\" src=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/pexels-duong-nhan-1510149-267x400.jpg\" alt=\"nobody understands me\" width=\"267\" height=\"400\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/pexels-duong-nhan-1510149-267x400.jpg 267w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/pexels-duong-nhan-1510149-400x600.jpg 400w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/pexels-duong-nhan-1510149.jpg 709w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 267px) 100vw, 267px\" \/><p id=\"caption-attachment-136756\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">photo by Duong Nhan for Pexels<\/p><\/div>\n<p><span style=\"color: #333399;\">by Andrea M. Darcy<\/span><\/p>\n<p>&#8220;<em>Nobody understands me, and I am lonely even when I am with people&#8221;.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong>Sound familiar? <\/strong>Feeling misunderstood is serious. It can lead to <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/anxiety-vs-depression.htm\">depression and anxiety<\/a>.<\/p>\n<h2>Why should I want to feel understood?<\/h2>\n<p><strong>Feeling understood leads to<\/strong> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/mental-wellbeing.htm\">wellbeing<\/a>. A <a href=\"https:\/\/www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov\/pmc\/articles\/PMC2652476\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">study on undergrads at the University of Virginia<\/a> connected feeling understood to not just <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/being-happy-why-is-it-so-hard.htm\">greater life satisfaction<\/a>, but even fewer <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/medically-unexplained-symptoms-counselling.htm\">physical illness symptoms<\/a>.<\/p>\n<h2>5 Reasons why you feel &#8216;nobody understands me&#8217;<\/h2>\n<p><strong>So why do you feel so<\/strong> misunderstood? And what can be done about it? See if the below sound familiar.<\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #333399;\">1. You are afraid of intimacy.<\/span><\/h3>\n<ul>\n<li><em><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/trusting-others-hard.htm\">Find it hard to trust others<\/a>? <\/em><\/li>\n<li><em>Worry that if you let someone close, they will inevitably <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/fear-of-abandonment.htm\">abandon you<\/a>? <\/em><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong>Even if you are friendly and outgoing,<\/strong> a <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/fear-of-intimacy.htm\">fear of intimacy<\/a> could still be your root issue. Many <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/jung-personality-types.htm\">socially adept people<\/a> are <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/get-closer-intimacy-issues.htm\">intimacy phobic<\/a>. Their outgoing exterior is a perfect way to hide their <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/feeling-of-fear.htm\">inner fear<\/a>.<\/p>\n<blockquote><p><span style=\"color: #800080;\">Not letting people close to you then expecting them to understand you doesn&#8217;t work. It&#8217;s like expecting someone to cook you a meal but not letting them within ten feet of the stove. <\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #333399;\">2. <strong>You fear being judged.<\/strong><\/span><\/h3>\n<ul>\n<li><em><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/bad-parents-are-you-one.htm\">Grew up with critical parents<\/a> or teachers?\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/feeling-not-good-enough.htm\">Never felt good enough<\/a>, no matter how hard you tried?<\/em><\/li>\n<li><em>And does that voice now run through your head still?\u00a0<\/em><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong>This can lead to being an adult who hides certain things <\/strong>about yourself in order to not be judged and who always feels &#8216;nobody understands me&#8217;.<\/p>\n<blockquote><p><span style=\"color: #333399;\"><span style=\"color: #800080;\">We do need to <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/oversharing-syndrome.htm\">use our judgement about who we open up around<\/a>. Not everyone is safe territory. But if you are endlessly cherry picking what bits of you to reveal to others,\u00a0 for fear of being judged, you aren&#8217;t giving anyone a full picture they can understand.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #333399;\">3. You don&#8217;t trust others.<\/span><\/h3>\n<ul>\n<li>\n<div id=\"attachment_122272\" style=\"width: 410px\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/94812484_c02c3ee2e3-2.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-122272\" class=\"wp-image-122272 size-medium\" src=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/94812484_c02c3ee2e3-2-400x300.jpg\" alt=\"nobody understands me\" width=\"400\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/94812484_c02c3ee2e3-2-400x300.jpg 400w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/94812484_c02c3ee2e3-2.jpg 500w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 400px) 100vw, 400px\" \/><\/a><p id=\"caption-attachment-122272\" class=\"wp-caption-text\"><em>By: <a href=\"https:\/\/www.flickr.com\/photos\/78365458@N00\/94812484\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noreferrer\">Carol Walker<\/a><\/em><\/p><\/div>\n<p><em>Had a childhood where you couldn&#8217;t trust the adults who were supposed to take care of you?<\/em><\/li>\n<li><em>Suffered either <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/what-is-child-sexual-abuse-why-your-definition-might-need-updating.htm\">physical abuse<\/a> or <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/narcissistic-parenting.htm\">emotional abuse<\/a>?<\/em><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"color: #333333;\">If you are projecting an energy of wariness, people sense you won&#8217;t trust them. Meaning they might not feel like investing in the effort to understand you if they&#8217;ll just be kept at bay. It&#8217;s like you are wearing a sign declaring \u201cI won&#8217;t let you close\u201d, but still expecting them to try.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #333399;\">4. You are codependent.<\/span><\/h3>\n<ul>\n<li><em>Are you hoping that if someone else totally understands you, you will then feel better about yourself? <\/em><\/li>\n<li><em>Or find that in relationships and<a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/friendship-and-love.htm\"> friendships<\/a> you change your personality and hobbies to match the other person?<\/em><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/codependency-symptoms-modern-times.htm\">Codependency<\/a> is <strong>an addiction to seeking approval and validation from others<\/strong> to the point you can lose sight of who you are. And if you <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/a-sense-of-self-who-am-i.htm\">don&#8217;t know who you are<\/a>, it&#8217;s hard for anyone else to know and understand you.<\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #333399;\">5. You need to learn how to communicate to stop being misunderstood.<\/span><\/h3>\n<ul>\n<li><em>Speak in a convoluted way where you constantly contradict yourself? <\/em><\/li>\n<li><em>Or always say the opposite of what you actually mean to say? <\/em><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"color: #333333;\">Perhaps you are agreeing to things that actually you don&#8217;t really believe, out an urge to be polite and accepted (again, a <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/great-codependency-hoax-codependent.htm\">codependent habit<\/a>). This all results in people having the entirely wrong idea about who you really are. No wonder you feel misunderstood!<\/span><\/p>\n<h2>10 Techniques to help you feel understood by others<\/h2>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/harleytherapy.com\/?utm_source=Harley%20Therapy%20Blog&amp;utm_content=Mid%20Post\">Talk therapy<\/a> is of course highly recommended, not least as it gives you the chance to experience what it is like to be understood by another (your therapist!). But you can also use the below tactics to start feeling more understood.<\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #993366;\">1. Learn to communicate more clearly.<\/span><\/h3>\n<div id=\"attachment_11959\" style=\"width: 347px\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/15458431511_764d3b48c9.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-11959\" class=\"wp-image-11959 \" src=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/15458431511_764d3b48c9-369x400.jpg\" alt=\"why does nobody understand me? \" width=\"337\" height=\"365\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/15458431511_764d3b48c9-369x400.jpg 369w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/15458431511_764d3b48c9.jpg 461w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 337px) 100vw, 337px\" \/><\/a><p id=\"caption-attachment-11959\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">By: <a href=\"https:\/\/www.flickr.com\/photos\/128431605@N05\/15458431511\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noreferrer\" \">John Hain<\/a><\/p><\/div>\n<p><strong>Sometimes we think <\/strong>&#8216;nobody understands me&#8217; and it&#8217;s literally true as our <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/communication-problems.htm\">communication skills<\/a> are lacking.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Start to really notice the way that you talk.<\/strong> Do you <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/why-you-talk-too-much.htm\">speak really fast<\/a>? Constantly throw questions at others, so that they barely have time to even ask you about yourself? Are you agreeing with things you don&#8217;t like, and giving the wrong impression?<\/p>\n<p><strong>It can even help to<\/strong> record yourself having a conversation and listen to it later.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Also notice if you are constantly starting your sentences with<\/strong> \u201cYou did\/said\u201d and \u201cYou made me feel\u201d. This is <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/why-we-put-the-blame-on-others.htm\">blame<\/a>, which pushes the person away, creating the opposite effect of them wanting to understand you. Far better to own your feelings. &#8220;I feel this when you do or say that.&#8221;<\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #993366;\">2. Change your body language.<\/span><\/h3>\n<p>Your<a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/the-power-of-body-language.htm\"> body language<\/a> communicates almost as much as your words. Uncross your arms when you talk to others, it shows you want to be open. Try to <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/release-muscle-tension.htm\">relax your shoulders<\/a>, and smile softly to stop any natural tendency to frown.<\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #993366;\">3. Slow down and switch perspective. <\/span><\/h3>\n<p><strong>When we are worked up we tend to revert to habits.<\/strong> This includes <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/assumptions-in-relationships.htm\">the habit of assuming<\/a>\u00a0&#8220;nobody understands me&#8221;.<\/p>\n<p><strong>If you feel the thought rising, extricate yourself from the situation<\/strong> and take a moment to slow down. Take a few deep breaths, perhaps even try a <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/how-to-de-stress-mindfulness-relaxation-break.htm\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">2-minute mindfulness break<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #333333;\">Then ask yourself:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><span style=\"color: #333333;\">Was I really being misunderstood? <\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"color: #333333;\">Or am I upset about something else entirely, like that they don&#8217;t agree with me?\u00a0 <\/span><span style=\"color: #333333;\">Or that I&#8217;ve <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/having-a-bad-day.htm\">had a stressful day<\/a>? <\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"color: #333333;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/what-is-perspective.htm\">What might this look like from their perspective<\/a>?<\/span><\/li>\n<li><span style=\"color: #333333;\">In what ways did they show they were trying to understand me that maybe I overlooked?<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #993366;\">4. Become a \u201cme detective\u201d.<\/span><\/h3>\n<div id=\"attachment_11960\" style=\"width: 408px\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/3709203268_1f8afc8392.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-11960\" class=\"wp-image-11960 \" src=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/3709203268_1f8afc8392-400x264.jpg\" alt=\"understanding myself\" width=\"398\" height=\"263\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/3709203268_1f8afc8392-400x264.jpg 400w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/3709203268_1f8afc8392.jpg 500w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/3709203268_1f8afc8392-180x120.jpg 180w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 398px) 100vw, 398px\" \/><\/a><p id=\"caption-attachment-11960\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">By: <a href=\"https:\/\/www.flickr.com\/photos\/somegeekintn\/3709203268\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noreferrer\" \">Casey Fleser<\/a><\/p><\/div>\n<blockquote><p><span style=\"color: #666699;\">The more you understand yourself, the more clearly you present yourself to others. And the more they can understand you. <\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>So spend time learning about yourself.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Make lists of what you like and what you don&#8217;t like.<\/li>\n<li>Notice what things actually make you happy during a normal day, versus what things you assume should make you happy.<\/li>\n<li>Start paying attention to<a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/how-to-listen-to-yourself.htm\"> how you really feel about things<\/a>.<\/li>\n<li>Perhaps engage with the power of <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/bibliotherapy-read-yourself-better.htm\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">self-help books<\/a>, or join a self development course where you can learn new techniques for getting to know yourself.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #993366;\">5. Trade in your victim mentality.<\/span><\/h3>\n<blockquote><p><span style=\"color: #333399;\">There can be something altogether addictive about feeling misunderstood. It can become your identity, something that can make you feel special and give you the chance to feel sorry for yourself non stop. In other words, it gives you an excuse to<a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/live-life-like-victim-12-ways-tell.htm\"> always be a victim<\/a>.<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><strong>What would happen if you decided that you are responsible for your own life,<\/strong> and could choose to find people who want to understand you? And wouldn&#8217;t it be worth trading in the benefits of <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/victim-mentality.htm\">victimhood<\/a> for the benefits of being understood?<\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #993366;\">6. Learn to see what people <em>do<\/em> give you instead of feeling &#8216;nobody understands me&#8217;.\u00a0<\/span><\/h3>\n<p>Being misunderstood can also be a habit to the point you don&#8217;t even notice if people are trying their best to understand you. Or perhaps they are giving you other, equally important things, even if they are not easily able to &#8216;get&#8217; you.<\/p>\n<blockquote><p><span style=\"color: #800080;\">Change your focus to what they ARE giving you. Are they a<a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/good-listener-person-centred-counselling.htm\"> good listener<\/a>? Did they donate their time to help you out? Do they always answer your calls, give you attention?<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #993366;\">7. Embrace the power of acting &#8216;as if&#8217;. <\/span><\/h3>\n<p>If you are feeling misunderstood by someone, try asking yourself, &#8220;How would I treat them if I DID feel understood?&#8221; And go ahead and try to change the way you are acting. This could be being less aloof, or simply staying put instead of having a tantrum and walking away. Their behaviour might change with yours.<\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #993366;\">8. Give others understanding first.<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><strong>If you aren&#8217;t offering others understanding, why would they then offer it to you?<\/strong> Take a good look at your<a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/feeling-ignored-how-to-get-people-to-listen.htm\"> listening skills<\/a>.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Are you taking in what others say without interrupting?<\/li>\n<li>Do you accept their opinions, or are you constantly offering them <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/giving-advice-in-relationships.htm\">unasked for advice<\/a>?<\/li>\n<li>Do you ask them <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/good-questions-to-ask.htm\">thoughtful questions<\/a> about what they said?<br \/>\nOr just jump in with a story all about you that relates to what they said?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #993366;\">9. Recognise everyone is unique.<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/you_are_unique.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\" wp-image-5846 alignright\" src=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/you_are_unique-500x333.jpg\" alt=\"no one understands\" width=\"380\" height=\"253\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/you_are_unique-500x333.jpg 500w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/you_are_unique-400x267.jpg 400w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/you_are_unique-768x512.jpg 768w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/you_are_unique-180x120.jpg 180w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/you_are_unique.jpg 1024w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 380px) 100vw, 380px\" \/><\/a><strong>The truth is that we all are unique, with our own way of seeing the world<\/strong>. It&#8217;s simply not possibly for someone to understand you entirely, or for you to understand someone else entirely. So drop the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/setting-expectations.htm\">expectation<\/a>.<\/p>\n<blockquote><p><span style=\"color: #333399;\">The only person who can understand you entirely is you.<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #993366;\">10. Work on your self-esteem.<\/span><\/h3>\n<p><strong>If we want to be understood by others we need to believe that<\/strong> we deserve to be understood. And for that we need a sense of <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/boost-low-self-esteem-counsellor.htm\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">self-esteem<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Start noticing the good things about yourself. And when someone offers you a compliment,<\/strong> don&#8217;t brush it off, accept it. There are many great <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/bibliotherapy-read-yourself-better.htm\">books on self-esteem<\/a> as well, so some research can help here.<\/p>\n<h2>Can a Therapist Can Help Me Feel Understood?<\/h2>\n<p><strong>Therapy is all about<\/strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/what-is-the-therapeutic-alliance.htm\"> forming a strong relationship with your therapist<\/a> in a trusting environment. Sometimes all we need is the experience of what a trusting relationship is to then be brave enough to create more of that understanding for ourselves outside the therapy room.<\/p>\n<p>A <a href=\"https:\/\/harleytherapy.com\/therapists\/?utm_source=Harley%20Therapy%20Blog&amp;utm_content=Post%20End\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">psychotherapist or counsellor<\/a> can also really help you sort out what is true, and what is just your <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/self-critical-signs.htm\">inner critic<\/a> stopping you from being your best self.<\/p>\n<h2>When nobody &#8216;gets&#8217; you as you see the world differently<\/h2>\n<p>Again, in some cases, you might always be thinking &#8216;nobody understands me&#8217; as it&#8217;s true. Some people are born unique, and they see themselves, others, and the world differently than most people.<\/p>\n<p><strong>If this is the case, you might find you qualify for a diagnosis of a<\/strong> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/personality-disorder-a-help-guide.htm\">personality disorder<\/a> or <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/what-is-autism-spectrum-disorder.htm\">autism spectrum disorder<\/a>. In such cases talk therapy can be\u00a0 invaluable to help you understand the differences between you and others. It will help you learn how the ways you\u00a0 communicate need to change so that others can make sense of you and appreciate all you have to offer the world.<\/p>\n<p><strong><span style=\"color: #800080;\">Need help being understood with others? Our <a href=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/relationship-counselling-london.htm\">London-based psychotherapists and psychiatrists<\/a> are some of the best in their field. On a budget or not in London? Use our <a href=\"https:\/\/harleytherapy.com\/blog\">therapy listings site<\/a> to find a registered therapist near you.\u00a0<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #333399;\"><strong><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\" wp-image-114425 alignleft\" src=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/Screenshot-2019-02-23-at-18.17.37-395x400.png\" alt=\"Andrea M. Darcy\" width=\"117\" height=\"118\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/Screenshot-2019-02-23-at-18.17.37-395x400.png 395w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/Screenshot-2019-02-23-at-18.17.37-150x150.png 150w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/Screenshot-2019-02-23-at-18.17.37-768x778.png 768w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/Screenshot-2019-02-23-at-18.17.37-500x506.png 500w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/Screenshot-2019-02-23-at-18.17.37-200x200.png 200w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/Screenshot-2019-02-23-at-18.17.37-50x50.png 50w, https:\/\/www.harleytherapy.co.uk\/counselling\/wp-content\/uploads\/Screenshot-2019-02-23-at-18.17.37.png 792w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 117px) 100vw, 117px\" \/>Andrea M Darcy<\/strong> is a <a href=\"https:\/\/www.amdarcy.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">health and lifestyles writer<\/a> with counselling training, and the editor of this site. As a twice exceptional child who was also sensitive, she never felt understood. So writing this article was great fun and she&#8217;d enjoyed sharing all the things she has learned an experimented with over the years! Find her on Instagram @am_darcy<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>by Andrea M. Darcy &#8220;Nobody understands me, and I am lonely even when I am with people&#8221;. Sound familiar? Feeling misunderstood is serious. It can lead to depression and anxiety. Why should I want to feel understood? Feeling understood leads to wellbeing. A study on undergrads at the University of Virginia connected feeling understood to [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":8,"featured_media":136756,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","_lmt_disableupdate":"yes","_lmt_disable":"no","footnotes":""},"categories":[4,6],"tags":[378,325,431,260,284,379,262],"class_list":["post-5814","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-depression","category-relationships","tag-depression","tag-family","tag-friendship","tag-loneliness","tag-misunderstood","tag-relationships","tag-self-esteem-2","has_thumb"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v27.3 (Yoast SEO v27.3) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Nobody Understands Me - Can This Ever Change? - Harley Therapy\u2122 Blog<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Always feel &#039;nobody understands me&#039;? 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