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Zoning Out Too Often? You Might Be Dissociating

Originally by Andrea M. Darcy, Updated by Dr Sheri Jacobson 2025

Most of us ‘zone out’ now and then. You arrive home and realise you barely noticed your journey. Or you suddenly find you’ve eaten a whole pack of biscuits without really tasting them.

This kind of mild spacing out is normal – especially during times of stress or change. But if you regularly feel disconnected from your thoughts, emotions, or even your body, it could be something more serious: dissociation.

What Is Dissociation?

Dissociation is a psychological response where you disconnect from your thoughts, feelings, surroundings, or identity. It’s a way your brain tries to protect you from overwhelming stress or trauma.

Rather than staying fully present, you may mentally ‘check out’. It can feel like you’re floating, foggy, or watching life from outside your body.

In the DSM-5-TR (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, 5th Edition, Text Revision), dissociation is considered a disruption in the normal integration of consciousness, memory, identity, emotion, perception, body representation, motor control and behaviour.

Dissociation as a Defence Mechanism

As children, we often develop coping mechanisms to survive emotionally overwhelming experiences. Dissociation is one such survival tactic, especially for children who experienced:

  • Emotional, physical or sexual abuse
  • Chronic neglect or abandonment
  • Growing up with caregivers who were unpredictable or frightening

The brain responds by detaching from the moment – because being fully present is too painful. This might look like going numb, feeling floaty, or ‘leaving’ your body during distress.

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But while dissociation might have protected you as a child, it can interfere with adult life – especially in relationships, work and emotional wellbeing.

dissociation

Signs of Dissociation

Wondering if you might dissociate more than the average person? Common signs include:

  • Feeling spaced out, foggy or floaty
  • Losing track of time or experiencing memory gaps
  • Feeling emotionally numb or detached from what’s happening around you
  • Struggling to describe how you feel in the moment
  • Feeling as if life isn’t real or like you’re watching yourself from outside your body (known as depersonalisation or derealisation)
  • Becoming drowsy or sleepy when life gets stressful
  • People tell you that you’re “so calm” under pressure, but in reality, you feel disconnected
  • Forgetting important details or conversations
  • Delayed emotional reactions – realising how you felt hours or days after the event

Why Does Dissociation Happen?

Dissociation is strongly linked to trauma. It’s especially common in people who experienced:

  • Childhood abuse or neglect
  • Domestic violence
  • Sudden loss or traumatic grief
  • Medical trauma or accidents
  • Highly stressful or overwhelming life events

The brain learns to ‘disconnect’ as a way of coping when the body’s usual stress responses (fight, flight, or freeze) aren’t enough.

Is Dissociation a Mental Health Disorder?

Not always. Mild dissociation can be part of everyday life. But when it starts to disrupt daily functioning, it may fall under Dissociative Disorders, as recognised in the DSM-5-TR. These include:

1 . Depersonalisation/Derealisation Disorder

  • Feeling detached from yourself or your surroundings
  • The world feels dreamlike or unreal

2. Dissociative Amnesia

  • Trouble recalling important personal information, usually after trauma

3. Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID)

  • Previously called “multiple personality disorder”
  • Presence of two or more distinct identities, along with memory gaps

If you suspect you may have one of these, it’s important to speak with a mental health professional trained in trauma and dissociation.

dissociation The Cost of Constantly Dissociating

Frequent dissociation can have real-life consequences, including:

  • Struggling to connect emotionally in relationships
  • Being seen as distant or unresponsive by others
  • Missing opportunities due to appearing uninterested
  • Repressing emotions instead of processing them
  • Increased risk of anxiety, depression and PTSD
  • Feeling lost, misunderstood or “not fully alive”
  • Underperforming at work or school
  • Staying in harmful situations because you’re disconnected from reality

How to Stop Dissociating

While it may feel automatic or beyond your control, there are steps you can take to reduce dissociation:

📝 Track when it happens
Try journaling at the end of the day. When did you zone out? What was happening just before? What do you really feel now that you’ve had time to reflect?

🧘‍♀️ Practice grounding techniques
These help bring your attention back to the present. Try:

  • Naming five things you can see, four you can touch, three you can hear, two you can smell, one you can taste
  • Deep, slow breathing (e.g. 4-2-6-3 breath)
  • Cold water on your hands or face

🧠 Strengthen your mind-body connection
Mindfulness, yoga, tai chi or body-based therapies can help you reconnect with the present moment and your physical self.

Can Therapy Help with Dissociation?

Yes – therapy is often essential in addressing chronic dissociation, especially if it stems from unresolved trauma.

A skilled counsellor or psychotherapist can help you:

  • Identify what triggers your dissociation
  • Explore and process past trauma safely
  • Build healthier emotional responses
  • Learn grounding and regulation tools

At Harley Therapy, we only work with experienced practitioners (minimum 5 years’ clinical experience) trained to support clients with trauma and dissociation. We offer therapy in London and online worldwide.

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Blog Topics: Anxiety & Stress


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