So we need to have proper friendships where we can actually relax and trust.
If you are not sure if you are or are not in good company, read our article on “Toxic Friendships”.
2. Spending all your time trying to impress others.
How can anyone connect to us properly if we are so busy trying to impress them, we are never our real selves?
Our mental wellbeing immediately improves when we learn to be authentic. We gain back all the energy we were wasting trying to be someone else.
3. Just going along with things.
It can feel easy to just go along with what those around you are doing. You convince yourself that actually, you love working at an insurance company despite your degree in museum studies, and yoga is important even if the classes feel endless to you.
And then you slowly start staying home more, and watching more TV. You feel numb, but tell yourself you are just tired from work.
We think we are just boring, or mildly depressed, or don’t like being active. But when we dare to figure out what we like, and do things despite what others around us think? Our energy returns. The mental wellbeing ingredient of ‘staying active‘ becomes easy.
4. Going against your values.
Not actually sure what brings you joy?
Too many of us lead our lives by the values of those around us – our family, our social groups.
We think we are the ‘giving type‘. But actually, we aren’t giving at all, but manipulating. We are helping in order to receive – to get approval,self-esteem, a future payback.
The more we say no to things we don’t like, the more energy we have to take care of ourselves. The more we take care of ourselves, the better we feel.
And it’s when we feel good about who we are that we naturally start to help others, because we actually have the energy to spare. So the wellbeing ingredient of ‘giving to others‘ actually starts with giving to ourselves first.
7. Control freaking about your future.
Yes, goals and dreams are good for our mental health. They give us hope and keep us active.