Attachment theory believes that in order to grow up into an adult who can engage in relationships that work, you need to have had unconditional love and support in the first few years of your life from a primary caregiver.
If this did not happen, you develop a way of forming relationships with others, or ‘attaching’, that is problematic.
Learning about your attachment issues in therapy can give you all new clarity on what is not working for you in love, and what changes now need to be made.
4. Therapy stops you from repeating unhelpful patterns.
Do you find that, despite your best efforts to date someone ‘different’, you end up in the same toxic relationship pattern again and again?
Are you always dating someone controlling, always being too eager to please, or always dating someone emotionally unavailable?
Many of us tend to re-live the most problematic and unresolved relationship we had with a primary caregiver (yes, in other words, you are dating your parents!). Most types of therapy (not all, not CBT, for example) dig into your childhood to find where your faulty patterns of relating that leave you feeling unloved stem from. Schema therapy in particular looks at patterns and helps you transform them.
Interested in what other types of therapy could help you with love and romance?
Would you like to explore some of all these points about love with a highly trained, friendly therapist? Harley Therapy connects you with therapists who can help you with love and romance issues. If one of our four London locations doesn’t work for you, consider Skype therapy, as flexible as you are.
Would you like to share an experience of how therapy helped you find love and romance? Or have a question about therapy and your love life? Post in the public comment box below.