Making you feel ‘special’ is a way to lure you away from your old self so he or she can take control over you.
2. You are on a cycle of highs and lows but the highs are amazing so can’t be bad…
Do you feel rushes of energy when they call or text, or when you meet them? When you part do you feel desolate, a bit bored, even like your skin is itchy? Have you ever gone home from being with them and felt suddenly sick and crawled into bed for a ‘nap’? These are signs you are in an addictive relationship.
3. You are having sex you don’t quite want to have.
But if your partner is pushing you to do sexual acts you are not comfortable with, if you are in any way being hurt without permission during sex, or if you are not being asked for your approval or opinion around sex but feel that you are obligated to do as he/she wants? This is not healthy and might even be abusive.
4. You are under or overeating since the relationship started.
Overeating is often a sign we are stuffing down our emotions instead of facing them head on. What might you be trying not to think about or feel? Journalling can help.
Practice emotional eating when single, but when ‘in love’ tend to lose interest in food?Love addiction means that when we get our high off another person we drop our other ‘drugs’.
5. Your are a very, very helpful person these days.
Yes, helping a loved one is normal. But try this. Set a timer to go off once an hour. And when it goes off, be honest. What you were thinking about? Is it your partner and his/her problems most of the time?
Constantly troubleshooting your partner’s problems to the point you no longer even think about yourself is a sign of major codependency or people addiction.
You didn’t apply for the job promotion because you just don’t want it anymore. And that joke you made about how you talk too much, or the one about how you really need to change your outdated wardrobe, they were just casual observations.
Or were they? Would you have made such remarks before the relationship? And let that job slip?
Anxiety is not always a sign that the relationship itself is unhealthy. It might be that you have anxious attachment disorder, where your childhood has led to any adult relationship causing you stress. But if you read about anxious attachment and it doesn’t sound like you, consider if your anxiety might be a sign that you are not comfortable in the relationship.
8. Your sleep has gone out the window since the relationship started.
Yes, infatuation can lead to some sleepless nights. But if your sleep patterns continue to suffer or even get worse? Take notice.
Some of us are very good at pretending life is great in the daytime. Our worries and anxieties surface at night, or wake us up from anxious dreams.