Attachment theory believes that to grow up into confident adults we need to have at least one caregiver as a child we can fully trust to be there for us, and love us no matter what. If for any reason that was compromised for you, you can end up with an attachment disorder, the most common of which is anxious attachment.
Is your feeling of fear limited to a certain object or animal? A certain place, a situation itself that you are afraid of? Or even a feeling you don’t want to ever have or you panic?
Even if people tell you you are being silly about it, do you go out of your way to avoid that thing? And when you think about it, do you feel not just fearful, but terrified?
However we ended up with phobias, they are serious and can be increasingly debilitating if we don’t seek help. They do respond well to treatment though, particularly cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) and, sometimes, exposure therapy.
Do you have fears that other people or organisations are out to get you?
We all sometimes are suspicious or afraid other people. Perhaps they remind us of someone from childhood who treated us poorly. Or perhaps they really are someone to be scared of, and have antisocial personality disorder.
In a new job, and feeling fearful all the time? You might be mistaking fear with excitement.
If we were raised in an environment where one of our caregivers was always saying they were ‘afraid’ of things, then we can take on this behaviour. Instead of recognising that the rush of adrenaline before trying your first dance class, or date with someone you like, is just the excitement of pushing your boundaries and trying something new? You decide you are afraid and back out.