EFT Therapy for Couples in London

‘Emotionally Focused Therapy’ often abbreviated to EFT, is a structured and highly effective approach to couple therapy that is evidence-based and widely recognised by leading psychological bodies. Unlike "tapping" techniques (also called EFT), this is a talk therapy based on attachment science. It is designed specifically to help you move from distressed isolation to a secure, loving bond, leaving your relationship resilient and revitalised.

EFT engages you and your partner in an exploration of your ‘emotional dance’ at the same time as you are guided through sharing your deeper vulnerabilities. This can mean things like identifying how a partner's withdrawal triggers the other’s pursuit, or vice versa. While it might at first sound daunting, research suggests that focusing on these underlying emotions causes a de-escalation of conflict and a softening of the barriers between you. 

Bonds can then be rebuilt as more secure and responsive. You don’t even have to have ‘perfect’ communication skills for it to work, as EFT focuses on the heart of the matter—the emotional connection itself*. *Source: The Practice of Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy: Creating Connection. Johnson, S.M. (2019) 

EFT can be used with couples, families, and individuals, and can be tailored specifically to work with issues such as trauma, infidelity, and abuse.

EFT has also been shown to work well with couples who have low incomes, couples with little formal education, and couples where the husband is rated by the wife as inexpressive - three groups that do not typically do well in other forms of couples therapy. 

EFT appears to create lasting change. Unlike several other forms of therapy, where the positive effects begin to drop off almost immediately at the end of treatment, clients who complete a course of EFT maintain their gains – and even continue to improve on them – over the next 24 months, without any additional treatment.

Within an Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) framework, common anxious–avoidant relationships are not chaotic — they are organised around a predictable pursue–withdraw cycle. In therapy couples are able to identify and de-escalate these destructive cycles, and promote new cycles of safety, security, and emotional connection.

No. While they share an acronym, Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) for couples is a scientifically validated talk therapy based on Adult Attachment Theory. It does not involve tapping on meridian points. It is a professional psychological framework used to help couples identify the emotional patterns that keep them stuck in conflict.

Worried about the vulnerability of couple counselling? Like any sort of talk therapy, you and your partner might feel emotionally raw or sensitive after a session. Or like you need some quiet time together to process what was shared, much like you would after an unusually honest conversation. But otherwise, Emotionally Focused Therapy is a completely safe and supportive experience.

Every couple’s journey is unique, but Emotionally Focused Therapy is a structured, short-term model that typically spans between 8 to 20 sessions. Research indicates that many couples begin to feel a significant shift and a "de-escalation" of their conflict within the first few weeks. 

While deeper issues or long-term betrayals may require a longer commitment to fully restructure the bond, the goal is always to provide you with the tools to navigate your relationship independently. Much like learning a new language together, the initial sessions involve intense focus, but soon the new way of communicating becomes your natural way of being*. *Source: The Practice of Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy. Johnson, S.M. (2004)